It's so fun to be me.

To start my week off right, my youngest decided to forget to take a bath Sunday night. So I had to give him a shower Monday morning, a prospect that as anyone who has ever had to get pokey kids ready for school in the morning knows, did not thrill.

So, he gets up there, pulls off his shirt, and reveals....

chicken pox.

joy.

Soooo come to find out that his pediatrician? has moved. A couple of towns away. what was 5 mins. in the car would now be a 30 min trek on the freeway. What was a small practice with one doctor, one receptionist, and a couple of nurses has become a huge multipractice with a major switchboard capable of keeping one on hold for at least 15 minutes. probably longer. It took that long for me to hang up and try the cancer clinic, in the vain hope that they would be able to tell me SOMETHING.

They could. they told me to keep him the hell away from them. (ok, they were a bit more polite.) So, I finally get through to his former pediatrician's office, and talk to some nurse who was reading the chicken pox information off of an online manual. Which, btw, I could have found myself, much faster, by google-ing. Just saying.

So, chicken pox boy and me are hanging out.

Now, the PLAN was to go to the in-laws for T-day. However, now the PLAN was for husbandguy and the other two boys to go to the in-laws for T-day.

except the man-boy (who is doomed) had already decided that he was eating turkey at his in-laws.. I mean, girlfriend's house. So it would be just Husbandguy and midkid going down to the in-laws, where they are supposed to load up on turkey to bring back to those of us who have to stay home.

Till this morning, when husbandguy decided that he wasn't about to brave 40 mph winds, snow and ice to drive 100 some miles one way for turkey.

THE PLAN, once again, went into the dumpster.

So, at 8:30 this morning, I was informed that no one will be bringing me back turkey and trimmings, and that if I want Thanksgiving dinner, I'm going to have to make it myself.

joy.

yay.

Can y'all SENSE the enthusiasm wafting over the intarweb?

me neither.

So, I went out this morning, bought all the crap I needed to buy to make T-day, and get to eat late. and clean up. and cook.

on the plus side, chicken pox boy seems to be over the worst part, partly because, as I was putting lotion on his pox, he pointed out a scabbed over one on his hip and said "oh yeah, that was there Sunday or Saturday."

thanks, kid. that's great. Whose house were you playing over at on Saturday and Sunday? That's my boy! spreading disease and pestilence with great holiday gusto.

Soo.. any takers on how interesting my Yule celebrations are going to be?

I gotta go take pie number one out of the oven now.

Happy Thanksgiving!!!!

Been a while, huh?

Now, I could wish that life was more interesting... but really, who in their right minds ever wishes that?

Good news interesting is always good... but again, how many times does THAT happen?

And bad news interesting? I don't want to think about it.

Random:
What do celebrities think about people who put up webpages to them? I mean, here's a guy, just working his craft, and some random person has a webpage going on about how hot he is or whatever, and then come to find out that said random person is a middle aged librarian or something. who really needs to diet. and get her teeth cleaned. I mean, is the actor going to be glad anyway, since he's getting exposure? (not like that. geez.) or is he going to be creeped out that this person is obsessed enough with him to put up a webpage about him. What if she has self-insertion fanfics with him? I mean, that has GOT TO be creepy.


Cherry starbursts. sour or regular. gift. from. the. Gods.


Okay, men? how hard is it to hit the toilet? Why can't you clean up after yourselves?


My youngest just came in the door yelling "It's snowing!". I am so not ready for snow. please. It was just in the 70's last week, what. the. hell?


How many people are actually ready for the holidays at this point, and why? really--- why?


Happy Holidays. You know it's a holiday somewhere.
Earth Calendar.. a holiday, every day.
For instance.. today is the International Day for Tolerance.

this, of course, means that I have to complain about random people some more.

For those from "I'm not sorry" who are interested.

I've never had an abortion. never. I've been with friends who've gotten one, and I have friends who have gotten one, but I've never needed the procedure.

I've had my birth control fail on me three times. that I know of.

I have three sons.

The first time was when I was 20 years old, a stoner, smoker, drinker, party girl with a boyfriend that I chose for his stamina in bed, his beard, his sarcastic wit, his sense of style, and the fact that he was a DJ and a film major. Our relationship was on the rocks anyway, when I discovered that you really do have to take the pill at the SAME TIME every day. Either that or the Quality control at Ortho-Novum was not really up to par in 1987.

When I informed boyfriend, he informed me that if I didn't get an abortion, I would ruin his life, and that he was telling his new girlfriend that I was a lot farther along than I was, because he had told her that he had broken up with me months ago. Like I said, I wasn't looking for a husband here, I was looking for a good time. I got what I wanted, didn't I?

My parents are moderately Pro-Life. They also put their money where their mouths were, and took my pregnant self back in, and paid for an OB/GYN. Unfortunately for all concerned, I developed Pre-Eclampsia and Toxemia, and had to be delivered early by C-Section. My son was a preemie and went immediately to the PICU in a nearby children's hospital.

Since all these complications cost way too much, I ended up turning to the dark side and going on welfare.

Yes, I'm an evil, evil Welfare Queen. (at one time.) I had a child that I could not support. I went back to college, got my degree, got a job, went off welfare. yay me. Still an EVYILLL single mom. Fungus on the Family would still not approve.

and let's talk about allll the help I received from various "pro-life" organizations..

*crickets*

Planned Parenthood did give me free birth control, though. YAY for PP.

The boy turns 18 this week. I wouldn't have missed this ride for the world.

Part two

The second time my bc failed, I was with a man that I had chosen for, among other things, his parenting qualities. He was fantastic with my 6 year old son, sweet, optimistic, sincere, and I still love him.

At the time I was 28, had just been laid off from my job, was living in a new city, had been with lover for over a year, and was looking for a summer job. then I discovered that a condom had broken at some point, and we missed it, or that one had leaked, or whatever, but.. hey. The stick was so pink, I'm suprised it didn't come with it's own Barbie.

We discussed it, and decided (for better or worse) that we could manage a baby. Okay, so insanity runs in the family, and I was yet again having a child that I could not support (having no health insurance) but this time I had the father on my side, we were a team, rah rah rah.

Called up the local "abortion alternaticve" center and asked them if they could help me, thinking, oh, that they would be able to supply prenatal vitamins, prenatal care, maybe some maternity clothes, affordable daycare for my infant when I went back to work.

WTF was I thinking? like I said.. insanity. the convo went something like this:

Me: "Hello, I was wondering if you could help me. See, I don't have any health insurance, and I'm pregnant, we want to keep the baby, I already have one child, what can you do for me?"

Numbnuts AA: "We can give you a layette and help you sign up for welfare."

Me: "..."

yep... lotsa help from those freaks. I signed up for Healthy Start and WIC my own damn self, thanks anyway. The layette I still had from my FIRST child, did I mention that I ALREADY HAVE A KID? yes? good.

At any rate, Lover and I decided that since we were getting married anyway, we might as well do it now, and not wait a couple more years, like we had originally planned. I was 6 months preggers at my wedding, and if anyone had something to say, they could stuff it. Fortunately I had left the Catholic Church by this point, so I didn't have to put up with any flak from a "pro-life" church... We had a UU minister.

Remember how I was gonna get a summer job? That went down the tubes fast, as I had a high risk pregnancy. Aparantly my body just DOES NOT deal with spawn very well.

but midkid was delivered after I was induced, in the middle of a freaking snowstorm, right before the superbowl.

9 lbs, 15 1/2 oz. VBAC.

I deserve a freaking medal.

Favorite quote from midkid?
"Squaredancing is a humiliation to my life."

Gotta love a kid who hates squaredancing.

part three

The third time my bc failed, I was married, with a kid in elementary school, and a toddler. A loveable, wonderfull 1 year old who started walking when he was 9 months old, and climbed on the furniture.

At that time, Husband and I were using that wonderfull form of birth control known as "modified rhythm." that is, we used condoms when we thought I might be fertile, based on when my periods came.

Yes, we can feed ourselves, and yeah.. we vote. Scary, huh?

at any rate, I was visited yet again by the ghost of the pink pee stick. yikes.

This time though, we had medical coverage, husband had a good job, we were in a fairly good place financially, so abortion wasn't even considered.

Till one of the tests came back funny. So we had a super-ultrasound done, found out that it was a third boy, and that he was healthy as could be. However, yet again, I was a "high risk" pregnancy, but this time I had the good drugs, so I wasn't as sick and miserable as I had been the last two times.

In the middle of summer I had my last baby. He was also a VBAC, 8 lbs, 13 oz, came out squalling.

I didn't think I could fall in love with him as I had my first and second boys. My first boy, I was so sick when he was born that I hardly registered that he was out. I remember asking my mother what he looked like, but that was about it. I didn't get to hold him till he was a week old. I didn't get to see him till he was 5 days old. My second, I hemorrhaged after the birth, and I was out of it.. only noticing that he had a full head of hair, and that he was FREAKING HUGE!

I loved my two boys so much, I didn't think I could love another one as much. But I did.

I also spent the first week home with him sobbing my eyes out because I thought I would never have another baby. Freaky, huh? inconsistant much? Now I would be THRILLED to have a free tubal. At the time, I wanted to keep my options open.

It's been over 7 years, and my little guy is in first grade now. He was diagnosed with ALL (Leukemia) when he was 2 1/2. He's been off chemo for a year and a half now, and he is the SMARTEST kid on the planet.

and he looks like Harry Potter with his glasses, which is kinda funny.

--------------------------------------------
On Abortion rights:

I CHOSE to have my three boys. I CHOSE to bring them into the world. I didn't choose to get pregnant, but I am DAMNED GLAD I had the choice availiable. I can never say I "had" to have my boys.

I have a friend who was pregnant, and her ONLY feeling was "Get This THING! OUT of me!" She aborted. I had a friend who was suicidally depressed during and after her only pregnancy that came to term, and she aborted a subsequent pregnancy, as the depression was heading itno psychosis territory. I have had friends who have aborted because they wanted careers, not kids, because it just wasn't the right time to have a baby, because they had as many kids as they could handle, and because they were too unstable to parent. I went with one friend to the clinic, where they wer not monsters, they were proffesionals who performed a needed medical procedure for a woman who was making her own decisions, much as I made my own decisions to have my boys.

Forcing women to have babies simply because their bc failed is akin to rape, imo. Consent to sex is not consent to pregnancy, no matter what the neanderthals scream.

You know what? I had my three kids. I'm not sorry I had them. but I'm done. My last pregnancy was hard enough, I'm almost 40, and Husband and I are done. We're not having any more, and we're content with that. That doesn't mean we are not having sex again, btw. Not exactly conducive to a good relationship, is it?

Unless you're a member of Fungus on the Family, that is...