High School, drugs, and lit. connections?

I'd like to point out the plotline of anything by Cormier: there's this kid, and his life sucks, and then? he dies. or his life gets worse. or both.

this is why kids in high school do drugs. depressing literature.

C'mon, you've got the Grapes of Wrath: life sucks, you're poor, then some guy who's dying breastfeeds off ya. the end. Anything by Dostoyesvski. That book about the dude who turned into a roach, Metamorphosis, by Kafka. Does anything good ever happen to that guy? Does Godot ever show up? Does the proverbial bear use cottonelle?

The Catcher in the Rye (one of my favorite books, by the way).. does Holden get better? no. does anything really happen in the entire book? well, he gets drunk. yay. then he breaks his sister's record. then he goes to see her. then he gets away. the end. He ends it right before the good part where he goes really nuts. What's up with that?

Depressing. The Jungle? good diet aid. The Crucible? yay! perjury is fun! or not. The Scarlett Letter? yeah. You have sex and horrible things happen. Might as well be an episode of Buffy. (seriously.. she has sex with Angel and what... he turns evil. go figure. Kids, just say no to sex with soul-cursed vampires. and ministers with spines made of silly putty)

Shakespeare. I actually like Shakespeare. when it's performed by competent actors. Have you heard your average High School student read Shakespeare? it's enough to make you slash your wrists, drown yourself in a pond, or better yet- pour poison in your ear. (If you really want to know the truth.)

Anything by Chekhov. Chekhov's grocery list would be depressing. Chekhov's journal of how he had the most amazing sex in the universe with three goddesses and a midget would be depressing. because it's Chekhov.

Lord of the Flies. Your plane crashes, and not only does Dharma NOT give you a handy dandy food drop, you have to paint your body and kill a pig. with a stick. Where's Locke when you really need him, eh?

How come we never got to read Heinlein in school? Starship Troopers would be an excellent High School Lit class book. (and no.. it's nothing like the movie. I think the filmakers read the back of the book, and took it from there.)And it's not depressing. Stranger in a Strange Land, Time Enough for Love- more great ones. How about Marion Zimmer Bradley's Mists of Avalon? should be required reading in High School. nope.. not depressing and dry enough, I guess. How about Potok's The Chosen and The Promise? better than Great Expectations, any day.

While I'm pretending, I'm going to require Stephen King's The Stand as well. imo, it's his best work. And the good guys win. yay!

Then I'll make them watch Mononoke Hime and tell me who they think is "the bad guy" 'cause that'll be interesting. Then they won't need happy pills anymore, right?

Oh what am I thinking?